I was reading in the newspaper today that ever since this economic downturn more Americans are turning towards sweets and sugary foods to ease their tension. The article, When Economy Sours, a Tootsie Roll Can Still Soothe the Soul by Christine Haughney in the New York Times today says:
"The recession seems to have a sweet tooth. As unemployment has risen and 401(k)'s have shrunk, Americans, particularly adults, have been consuming growing volumes of candy, from Mary Janes and Tootsie Rolls to Gummy Bears and cheap chocolates, say candy makers, store owners and industry experts."
I can only imagine the political cartoon for this new fad, as we all balloon up and get fat while searching for jobs online with a bag of trusty gummy bears by our side. As an aside, I have no clue what Mary Jane's are in terms of candy, but I could see how a Mary Jane, in the way I define it, would definitely soothe the soul right now.
And I'm glad to see people on my side of the camp finally. This organic food craze has driven me and my package of Double-Stuf Oreos up the wall. (Spell-checker thinks I spelled "Stuf" wrong. Ha, it doesn't know Oreos like I do). Since my first taste of refined sugar as a mere toddler I was hooked and knew that it might very well be the manna that some people search for. (I was a wise toddler.) And then everyone started poo-pooing sugar saying it causes hyperactivity. Isn't that the point? Anything that is euphoric in nature can cause hyperactivity. Caffeine causes hyperactivity, that's the point--to happily get shit done. To go about your daily dribble with a skip in your step and a manical smile on your face, which by the way, also keeps people from getting in your way.
As a parent, you can use this strategically. Let the kids have Lucky Charms in the a.m. and then send them outside to clean up the backyard. You'll be amazed at how fast that yard is immaculate. Teenagers do well with a cup of coffee or other caffeinated beverage here and there. Skyler can do amazing things with enough Red Bull. All at once he's doing the dishes, being a comedic genius and doing a little jig at the sink. It's not all bad. Moderation, folks. And moderation helps with the "healthy" stuff too.
I once heard a comedian talk about the water bottle craze where everyone was drinking water and carrying their own little water bottle everywhere. He said something along the lines of us having evolved to the point where we are complex mammals with ingenious digestive tracks..we can handle soda, we can handle coffee. Thousands of years of evolution being thrown away as we drink water like rabbits.
Do you really want to diss evolution and drink soda? You're either for evolution or not people.
So I am glad that I am finally not alone in my finely-granulated sugary world. Welcome to the Hotel Sugar-fornia. It's a lovely place. I'm happy to see visitors. In this hotel you will find the best Christmas cookies from around the world, the most divine chocolates and yummiest pastries. And in addition to the standard American holidays we celebrate, there is one more that comes every March: Girl Scout Cookie Week. I wait all year for Tag Alongs.
My guess is that even after the economy turns up and everyone is happy-go-lucky and spun off their dividends and 401(k)s and they are once again purchasing houses that are way out of their financial league and SUVs that leave a huge carbon tire print, they will still find the sugar-habit hardest to kick. The Eagles said it best, "You can check out anytime you like, but you can't ever leave."
And who'd want to? We've got Peeps galore.
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