I just had my identity stolen. I received an email from a company I knew nothing about. It was a receipt for what I think is a computer game that I did not purchase. Immediately calling the bank I get told I have to wait until the items “post” before we could file a claim against them. But then I realize which card it was on so I call back again. This time I get a young man who must have been in his first week of training as he suggested that we just block the company that the charge was for. What part of, “I didn’t order this. I don’t even know this company or what this product is,” does he not understand. I demanded to have my card blocked and be issued a new one.
Since that time, I have found that the criminal got one more charge through and tried a couple more times after that but was unsuccessful due to my blocked card.
Other than treating himself to a computer game, he attempted to open an iTunes account and then various other online purchases along the same lines that were blocked. I don’t even own an iPod, but apparently my criminal does. That’s right, he’s my criminal now. I own his ass now. Hey, I bought him for $49.99 right? I mean he was basically trying to take food out of my kids’ mouths. I think he should at least have to come clean the kitchen floors and take care of the bed-wetted linens that my children toss at the washer each a.m. (hopefully).
I have this weird way of dealing with stress. At the beginning I freak out like everyone else does, but soon after the preliminary rush of adrenalin I start to find the humor in the situation. I think it is a life saving measure, or at least a sanity saving measure. Kurt Vonnegut said, “Humor is a way of holding off how awful life can be, to protect yourself.” Well, I definitely felt in need of protection.
I realized the craziness of the situation while I was on the phone with the bank and trying to field whiny, crying children that were buzzing about me at the same time. I thought, “You really want me identity Mr. Criminal? Okay, you watch these five kids for one day and you tell me if you still want it.” Besides, I have poor credit? If you are going to steal someone’s identity isn’t it supposed to be someone whose identity is worth stealing?!
When it comes to material items, he obviously has a better life than me. Why he’d want my identity is beyond me. Of course, it was probably by stealing others’ money that he has these nice things. (By the way, I don’t know why I am sure it is a dude….other than the game her purchased seemed like a dude game). I mean, you would think that crime would be on the rise in this economy due to job layoffs and such. But then you would expect that the purchases would be of a more realistic, “need based” nature. Like ordering diapers and cloths from Wal-Mart. That kind of stuff. But this dude is obviously not hurting. I guess there is always job security in crime.
Now I am off to find safe ways to do business online and in person. By the by, my bank kicks ass and the whole thing is now being handled by their fraud department.



